Sunday, January 29, 2006
Someone Else is Reading It !!
Oh dear.... I knew I was having issues showing my baby to anyone else and decided I should try to get over it by sending the first chapter to two people who read and like the same sort of books I do - one of them is a test reader for some of my favorite authors (Hi Erin)....

I decided to do it and just "get over it". Instead of calming down once I'd sent the damned thing out, I'm scared to DEATH! Amazingly so! Appallingly so! What the heck?

It's not like it's the end of the world. It's not like things that are wrong aren't fixable. But I seem terrified in total disproportion to what is actually at stake.

You know what this tells me? This tells me that despite my attempts to reassure myself, despite the fact I have a perfectly good day job and technical publishing contract, I care. I really do want to do this to the point that it matters more deeply to me than I thought it would.

I guess I'd hope that it would get better over time and the fact this is my first baby is making it so bad but I'm not convincing even myself. I would ask for reassurance from folks that had been there that this stops but I think I know better.

So consider this my whiney post of the day and we'll see what my two readers have to say. And I'll keep a nice bucket nearby when I hear from them just in case my terror turns to throwing up.


  1. I loved what you sent. I need more. I'm going into withdrawal.

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